"Birds Have Tushies, Too"

So said Leon, who was watching a bird groom itself. Nevermind that the "tushie" was actually the bird's breast, looking particularly derriere-like as the bird turned its head to preen its tail feathers.

These days are filled with such gems. Leon and I get to spend a lot of time together, reason numero uno for leaving Maine for a year. Now instead of watching him grow up on Youtube from 3000 miles away, I can almost -- almost -- watch him grow before my eyes. He's gotten a lot better with a guitar pick. He sings "Puff the Magic Dragon" whenever he's not actively doing anything else, and often even  while doing something else. He calls himself "you" and everyone else "me" -- I didn't know toddlers had such a charming stage in language acquisition.

The two of us spend a lot of time together in anticipation of the arrival of his new brother. Coming soon! I'm so grateful to get to be such a close part of Russ, Cee, and Leon's family during this time.

As soon as the baby arrives, I take off for two weeks and turn Leon care over to his grandmother. I'll return to San Francisco once Russ goes back to work. In the meantime, I haven't decided yet where I'll go. Anyone want to join me for an adventure?

The Desert

Hi everyone,

I've spent the last month in the Mojave desert and I just got back to San Francisco yesterday. It's dreamy there... many thanks to Steph and Ethan for being such awesome hosts! I felt like part of the family; it was hard to leave.

I arrived in Joshua Tree on September 18th and it was still hot summer there. The first morning I had to hop out of bed soon after the sun came up so I wouldn't get baked in my room. The next morning Ethan, Steph, and I woke up at 3:30 to try to beat the heat on the infamous Cactus to Clouds hike. We started at sea level in the low desert and climbed all the way up to 10,800 feet.

Weirdest trailhead ever. This is from the street in front of the Palm Springs Art Museum. We just parked on a city street and began our hike right behind the museum.

After a few hours of hiking past cacti in the dark and cool, the sun (or, as Ethan called it, the "death star") came out. But we were high enough by then that not one of us got heat stroke! We did bring over 2 gallons of water each just in case. 

18.5 miles in, at the peak!

The summit was spectacular. This is just a few minutes before I lost Ethan and Steph, but thanks to the whistle on my pack, they found me and I didn't have to sleep up there!

A few days later, the winds of change blew through. Literally. The dry, cold, desert winds carried winter the day Steph drove me 20 minutes down the road to the Southern California Vipassana Center to begin my 10 day course there. Here was my daily schedule for 10 days:

Steph claims that I almost cried when I learned that I couldn't bring my journal with me. I didn't almost cry, but I was a little anxious -- not only was I going to give up my phone and computer for 10 days (easy), but I also had to leave behind my books, magazines, paper, and even pens. It might seem strange to you. If you'd like to know why, read more here.


In fact, if you're interested and can find the time to take one of these 10 day courses, I urge you to do it. It's a rarer and rarer chance to disconnect from distractions and observe and strengthen your mind. It's offered all over the world, free of charge (past students donate to make it possible for new students), and is staffed by volunteers. I was so moved by the love and care of the volunteer servers that I got choked up at a couple of meals! Even more poignant given that I couldn't express this appreciation to anyone (until the end, when we could talk).

I'm not sure how to sum up what my own personal experience was like. One thing I did notice was that the same fear came up that I experienced hiking the John Muir Trail. On my hiking trip, I started noticing a pain in my knee and worried that if I kept up the intense exercise, I would permanently damage it. I wasn't worried about the pain itself, but rather what it might mean in the long run. The same thing came up during my meditation, in almost the exact same words (in my mind, as I was maintaining silence). The only difference in the worry was that this time too much sitting, rather than too much exercise, might lead to permanent damage. In the midst of my anxiety, though, I could laugh at myself a little bit this time around. I remembered that on the trail, the pain had gone away after a few days and my legs felt stronger than ever. And so it happened with sitting, too. I'm not sure how to articulate the different way I've come to see my mind/body... but I like it. I'm so grateful I got to have both of these experiences.

At the very end of the course, we were allowed to talk. Here's a photo of me with some of the other folks who stayed in the same dorm as me (behind us):

And the last desert experience I'll leave you with:

Snow day!

Yes. Really.

I figured I ought to hike the highest mountain in Southern California, now that I'd hiked Cactus to Clouds.

 But it was the first snow of the season.

Here's where I parked.

I didn't see a single other person on the trail the entire day.

I wasn't the first one on the trail though:

 I felt right at home with the fallen maple leaves and the snow.

I love junipers even more now that I've spent a snow day with them!

The snow was glorious, but very slow. I had to turn back before I made it to the top. No regrets. Now I have a great excuse to return to the desert!